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Elden Ring DLC We'd Like To See

Elden Ring DLC We'd Like To See
FromSoftware | Nintendo

Written by 

Joseph Kime

Posted 

7th Mar 2022 16:46

As will come as no surprise to you at this point, Elden Ring has been popping off. The new outing by FromSoftware has proven to be worth the hype and has won the hearts of players and critics alike. The fantasy titan has already made itself one for the history books, and it's barely been out for two weeks so far. Not too bad, all things considered.

But, it doesn't seem that the game is done just yet. A mysterious colosseum has been discovered in the game, implying that we could soon be getting DLC of some kind. Whether it will be a PvP or Boss Rush mode remains to be seen, but it's got us thinking - where does a game this huge go from here? What could be next for the Lands Between, or by the time we get to give FromSoftware money once again, could we be moving on from there altogether?

Here are a few ideas we'd like to see come to life in Elden Ring next. And just to be clear, FromSoftware, these ideas aren't free. Call me.

Elden Ring DLC - Wrath Of The Pot King

Elden Ring DLC We'd Like To See
FromSoftware

If we're travelling the route of story DLC, then we've got a solid idea that'll be hard to pass up.

Imagine it - you show up to the Roundtable Hold looking to relax, but an NPC gives you a quest elsewhere. You travel to the location you need to, only to be met by a horde of pot friends. Too many to handle. You're wiped out almost instantly by the all-enveloping wave of ceramic fury.

You black out, and wake up at the feet of a giant Pot friend. Much bigger than you've ever seen before. He wears a regal robe and crown made of bones. You have found yourself in the court of the Pot King, and you must face the consequences of your savage murder of The Lands Between's pot population.

We'll let FromSoftware come up with everything from there, but we'd just be happy seeing a very big pot. That's the most important thing here.

Elden Ring - Fixing Difficulty With Automatic Firearms

Elden Ring DLC We'd Like To See
Raven Software

The eye of the storm when it comes to Elden Ring discourse is, of course, the game's brutal difficulty. It's a FromSoftware staple, and something the company seems deeply uninterested in remedying - but why not take care of the problem in the most on-the-nose way possible?

For a one-time fee, this DLC would very simply, give the player an automatic rifle. No bells, no whistles, just a weapon that spits deadly bullets and shoots even the most fearsome bosses to ribbons.

It could leave a permanent brand on the player's save just to keep the "you haven't played it until you've played it on the hardest difficulty" dorks happy, but give casual players the chance to drift through the game soaking up the stories that Elden Ring has to offer without wanting to scream for hours on end every time they discover a boss.

Elden Ring - Bri'ish Edition

Elden Ring DLC We'd Like To See
Unsplash Maria Teneva

The Lands Beyond are bleak and grim. You know where else is bleak and grim? The United Kingdom since 2016.

Players have been frustrated by trap chests teleporting them across the entire map of Elden Ring, but this could be an opportunity to teleport them somewhere truly horrible - Blackpool.

It could be a deeply humbling experience for the player, and indicative of how grim the last half-decade for Britons has been by simply not being all that different from the grey isles of The Lands Between. The player might be able to take on Margit the Fell Omen, but we'll see just how tough they are when they're faced with the throes of Luton Airport.

Kirby And The Forgotten Ring

Elden Ring DLC We'd Like To See
Nintendo

It's clear that with the Kirby and the Forgotten Land that the pink puffball can contend with ravaged landscapes and the post-apocalypse, so who's to say he can't manage what Elden Ring has to throw at him?

Drop Kirby into Elden Ring with absolutely no changes from The Forgotten Land, moveset, movement, all of it. Let him suck and copy all of the foes in The Lands Between and discover their abilities, and let him topple the many bosses of the game all by himself. He can manage it, and it'll make for a delightful gear change for the uber-difficult title.

Elden Ring Fit Adventure

Elden Ring DLC We'd Like To See
Nintendo

Similarly, have you ever sat down to play Elden Ring and thought "I wish I was getting a good workout while I was doing this?". Well, here's another opportunity for Nintendo to get a slice of the action.

Imagine darting through the foes that Elden Ring has to offer, but you can take them out while jogging on the spot and working up a sweat, similarly to Ring Fit Adventure. Sure, it can still be incredibly tough, but then it'll really fall to your physical prowess to determine if you still want FromSoftware-grade punishment. It'd give the game a whole new dimension of gameplay, and I bet mums everywhere would suddenly have an interest in Elden Ring.

Those are our best ideas for Elden Ring DLC, and though they'll likely never come to appear, we can always dream of slashing through pot friends across Birmingham. Not that kind of pot friend, though.

 

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