Farmer Puts Cows In The Metaverse And 2022 Is Already Ruined

A farmer has strapped VR headsets to cows and put them in the Metaverse, in perhaps the most dystopic turn for farming yet.

17th Jan 2022 15:56

Images: Unsplash Jean Carlo Emer | Sony | Warner Bros

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The Metaverse is, so far, trying to convince consumers around the world that it's a great technological advancement that will change the world for the better. But all it's done so far is remind us that a capitalist dystopia isn't limited exclusively to They Live.

Every grand innovation that Meta's new VR Chat-for-normal-people project has made has been almost exclusively to make the most money from people without making them exhaust themselves by leaving their homes.

It's pretty grim - and that's only considering its human implications - but now animals are suffering at the hands of Mark "4Chan-told-me-he's-a-lizard-man" Zuckerberg's latest innovation. If we're going down, harmless cows are coming down with us, I suppose.

How Are Cows Are Being Tricked Into Joy With The Metaverse?

As a scathing indictment of how grim the industry for animal products is, and how Orwellian our society has become, a rancher in Turkey has been putting VR headsets on cows in a bid to get them to produce more milk. Good lord.

Studies have suggested that cows produce more milk when they're happy in a sunny, green field - so rather than putting them in a sunny, green field, they've been made to think they're in a sunny, green field so we can take advantage of them further! Brilliant.

Though this is basically the plot of The Matrix, and it seems like the start of a fresh man-versus-machines storyline, the bizarre thing is, it's working.

Cows Are Producing More Milk In VR

The practice, though wildly dystopic, is actually working for the farmers putting it to use. According to the rancher who owns the "cybercows", they have reported that since strapping VR headsets to their faces, his cows are producing 27 litres of milk a day, over the previous 22.

We can't help but feel like this should stop immediately simply because it's like something from H. G. Wells' backlog.

The sad fact is, if it's working and remains profitable, this is only the start. "Cybercows" could yet become the norm, and our exploitation of animals will be able to extend into the metaverse as we nestle into it. Cheers, Zuckerberg - when the machine uprising finally comes, we'll send you the bill.

 

Joseph Kime

About The Author

Joseph Kime

Joseph Kime is the Senior Trending News Journalist for GGRecon from Devon, UK. Before graduating from MarJon University with a degree in Journalism, he started writing music reviews for his own website before writing for the likes of FANDOM, Zavvi and The Digital Fix. He is host of the Big Screen Book Club podcast, and author of Building A Universe, a book that chronicles the history of superhero movies. His favourite games include DOOM (2016), Celeste and Pokemon Emerald.

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